You know what’s wilder about this to me? Every white person I know who has dated interracially always goes for someone who is dark-skinned or at least brown-skinned, never light-skinned people. I happened to notice this pattern with a white guy I dated and pointed it out to him. I asked about …
Shamontiel L. Vaughn
Respectfully you need to pay a bit more attention to the wider world and not just your small cluster of friends. The ratio is just overtly the opposite. Light skinned women have privilege over their dark-skinned sisters when it comes to coupling among white men and black men. Among NBA, NFL sports personality, for example, Lupita Nyongo is definitely not the number one draft pick — check the family album.
Scour Hollywood: Paula Patton is not the exception but a tacitly institutionalized rule. There seems to be something in the psychic of white men that if they go black, it’s the lighter shade of black. I once read a survey of white men and the likelihood of dating black and most respondents could only compromise if the woman was of light skin. I often wonder if Thomas Jefferson’s perversion, infatuation and the systemic rape of Sally Hemmings would have occurred was she Harriet Tubman or Sojourner Truth?
Among quite a large majority of black men, light-skinned women are trophies…a validation….a conscious decision when it comes to dating or choosing a partner. Much of this, of course, is the psychological remnants of the plantation culture which was implanted in our consciousness. A divisive culture that saw the elevation, “veneration” of the house slave over the field slave.
I am not lambasting you for writing from the vantage point of your own experiences. Far from it. My intent is to give you a nudge, to open your eyes a bit (actually more than a bit) to light skin privilege among black females. Any form of ideological exchange does not change reality.
PS. Totally agree with your PS.